Poem: In My Mind

A look inside the three person war in my head.

I’m Having an Existential Crisis

I've been home a lot more recently instead of being at work like I used to be while everyone was in school. Now that it's summer, work has become slower and my hours have been chopped. This should sound great for someone like me who needs time to write, read, draw, crochet, and all of that, …

Restart: Day 2

I'm sitting on my bed at 6:30am on December 20th, 2017. Two days after beloved Kim Jonghyun committed suicide. Two days of grieving. But during this time, I've had so much time to think. (Read more) It's been over a month since I stopped trying at school and almost a month since I officially withdrew …

Restart: Day 1

I mourn the loss of those who never existed.

My Final Words

I knew this day would come. I didn't know when, but I knew it was going to come.This is my suicide note.Ever since my grandmother died, I think I lost my place in the world. I never got to find where I belonged. I couldn't. I had friends come and go, I lost family, but …

I am not lost.

I get asked about my religious beliefs and such every now and then. Depending on the person, they might ask a question about it. "Why?" Is one I get a lot. However, not too long ago, someone said, "People who don't believe in god are lost." I disagree completely. I am not lost. I left …

Page 13 – Learning to be Silent

Some things just are not worth responding to. If I hadn't said anything, I wouldn't have attempted suicide. Personal On June 13th, I got called into work. Originally, I wasn't scheduled, but I wanted the extra hours because I was going to a convention on June 23rd and 24th and could use whatever I got. …

Page 12 – Best Friend’s Day? (& Major Update)

National best friend's day but it feels like no one thinks of me as their best friend.

Page 11 – Am I Good Enough?

I often compare myself to others and ask, "Am I good enough?" despite knowing I shouldn't compare others to myself. But I can't help it.  Personal I feel fat and ugly almost all the time. I know I have nice features, but...I don't feel like they're enough. I don't feel good enough. People think I'm …

Page 10 – June

It's the sixth month of the year, but the year itself feels like it's been six years long already. Personal I'm already drained and I haven't done anything major. I already feel like I need a vacation even though I haven't worked much at all. Sigh. Celestial Symphony It's going okay. Writing is definitely going …